Sam Mellinger

The Kansas City Star

The column today is about what the Royals must do to cross the bridge from nowhere to somewhere, a sequel of sorts to this column and something we’ll keep touching on from time to time through the team’s (and Glass’ and Moore’s) most critical offseason in recent memory.

Two good pitchers and they have a very real shot in the American League’s worst division.

An empty offseason and they all get trashed in the paper.

I mentioned on Twitter the other day that I finished Joe Posnanski’s “Paterno” book, and I did so with the idea of putting my thoughts on it here. Some of you have been asking if it’s coming, and it is — I planned on doing it yesterday, but ran out of time. Expect it later today or, more likely, in the morning.

The plan for rest of this week is focused on the Chiefs, first the game in Green Bay on Thursday and then another column over the weekend. Might also be a bit of a surprise column midweek. This weekend, I’m going to a college football game as a fan for the first time in too long — my wife’s Michigan State Spartans against Boise State on Friday.

Anyway, best wishes to Teal Bunbury as he recovers from surgery, congratulations to Blue Valley North (and Mike Wolf) alum Jack Sock, and let’s get to it.

This week’s food recommendation is the fire dragon roll at Jun’s. As always, thanks for your help.

@patronaut0709 #TwitterTuesday if we help you do your job, can we get a cut of your pay?

No. Daddy’s gotta eat.

@lundb10 #twittertuesday what are your thoughts on Whitlock trashing posnanski. Which writer do u enjoy more?

I didn’t like reading it, because I have a layered and long respect for both. I won’t get into the specifics of the criticism, because like I said I’ll have more on the book here soon, but to answer the question it totally depends on the subject.

There is this game sportswriter nerds sometimes play, a hypothetical where you’re given an unlimited amount of money and can hire four writers to start a new publication. I don’t know why the number is always four, but it is, at least when I’ve played it, and three of the spots on my team haven’t changed for years:

Whitlock, Posnanski, and Dan Wetzel.

The fourth spot is a bit of a rotation, depending on my mood. Jason can do things that Joe just can’t, and the same is true in reverse.

@d_nadler Do I get a man card taken away if I order boneless wings? #TwitterTuesday

Any man who says he hasn’t felt this dilemma is either a vegetarian or a liar. You sacrifice authenticity — but it’s still that delicious wing taste — for not needing to crawl through a car wash to stop smelling like a chicken wing.

There is no easy answer here, and my answer is it depends on where you are. If you’re at a place with really good wings, order them with the bone. If you’re at a place like Buffalo Wild Wings, I’ll accept a boneless order, but you’d be smart not to order a beer that has “Lite” in the name.

Speaking of wings…

@ArrowheadPride #TT Proper way to eat wings at the Peanut — do you tear them in half or keep it together?

Grip and rip apart.

A couple pro tips, though. You should be able to tell right away if you can dig right in as soon as they’re put on the table. The service at every Peanut is endearingly slow, so there’s a chance the wings have been cooling down for a few minutes. If that’s the case, go ahead. But if you’re getting them right out of the heat, you will ruin the rest of your experience by going in too fast.

Patience is difficult, but you guys are mostly Chiefs and Royals fans, so you’re used to it. Difference is you know the wings will pay off.

Also, when you rip the wings apart, try to make it a clean break. You don’t want the meat from the wing-part to get caught up at the bottom of the drumstrick. And be conscious that when you break these bad boys, there might be sauce flying all around. Hopefully you didn’t wear a white shirt, and hopefully if you’re with your girlfriend, she’s not high maintenance.

@RealJEllis Would you rather have a trophy, cup or championship belt for winning your fantasy football league?

We throw out trophy immediately, and look at two very real positives for each of the remaining candidates.

The belt is beautifully obnoxious, and you can wear it over to your buddy’s house, either to watch games or, especially, for the next year’s draft. On the other hand, the cup is just a perfect prop in its own right, just begging for a friend to crack a joke, so you can sip, look back at him, and say, “I’m sorry, didn’t hear you. I was drinking from my championship cup.”

I have a little experience, here actually. I’ve never won a fantasy football title — more on that in a second — but back in my day I was a ridiculously talented beer pong player and, well, I know we’re all friends because I’m admitting this: I have a cup I won in a tournament with all my jackass friends.

And let me tell you, exaggerated sips from that thing at the bar never get old.

@mitchopkins What’s the name of your fantasy football team?

The Badly Coached Chokers.

I’m in a super-nerdy keeper league, and my team is loaded, a championship window that will probably close after this season. I had the best team in the league last year, but through a series of failures both mine and my guys in the last few weeks I ended up fourth.

Hence the name, and I’m not changing it back until they earn it.

@theGeneric1 #TT More wins this year: Mizzou conferense wins or kU total wins?

I have both at four, actually. Here’s how:

Kansas beats South Dakota State, Rice, Northern Illinois and Iowa State. Missouri beats Tennessee, Vanderbilt, Kentucky and Texas A&M.

Sorry about the push.

@MarkOandMikeH Went to “Happy Together” concert. Audience looked like open audition for Flomax commercial. Old guys you would see in concert?#tt

Saw Bob Seger at the Sprint Center a year or two ago, and through a family connection, sat in like the fifth row. It was fantastic. Man played for about two hours, energetic the whole time, and you’ve never seen so many happy middle-aged white people.

Wanted to go to Springsteen this fall, but got scared off by the ticket prices. I mean, I like him, but not THAT much.

@daviDLBaral Hey @mellinger any tips for a fledgling sports writer covering my university’s team for the school newspaper?

Yours is a relationships game, but don’t read that to mean the people you cover have to like you. They absolutely do not. But they should respect you, and know that you’re putting in an honest effort and while they shouldn’t expect to LIKE everything you write, they should expect it to be fair.

Also, try new things. You’re in college. If it doesn’t work out, step back and study why. Fix it. Improve it. Move on and get better. Beat writing is fundamentally set up so that it’s impossible for everything you write to be terrific, but if you go a while without writing something you’re proud of you’re probably doing it wrong.

@Ansley1987 I’m beginning to think I’m doomed for an existence of mediocrity and disappointment as a Royals and Chiefs fan. Am I wrong? #TT

I get what you mean, my man. Believe me. There is always hope on the horizon — if Cassel can be really good, if the Royals’ pitching comes along… — but two decades of unqualified failure to work against.

I still think the Royals will make the playoffs with this core group — if they don’t, it would be nearly unprecedented when compared to similar collections of young talent — and believe that if nothing else the NFL’s rules of parity mean the Chiefs will have some interesting seasons ahead of them.

One thing to always keep in mind whenever parity is discussed: the last 10 teams to represent the AFC in the Super Bowl are the Steelers, Colts, Steelers, Patriots, Colts, Steelers, Patriots, Patriots, Raiders and Patriots.

The Raiders are just a bizarre inclusion there, but the other nine spots are taken up by three organizations with franchise quarterbacks and owners with consensus admiration and respect throughout the league.

Just saying.

@ApexToApex I’d like to hear your take on Lance Armstrong in the Twitter Tuesday, if it already hasn’t been requested.

Well, I think a lot of things about Lance Armstrong. I think it’s strange that a reasonable person can conclude that he never doped, despite dominating perhaps the dirtiest sport in the dirtiest time of our sports history. Biking’s performances have dropped significantly since major changes in testing, and it’s been proven a near scientific impossibility for Armstrong to have done what he did without breaking some rules — not to mention the witnesses that have spoken out against him, and the longer list of witnesses USADA reportedly has ready.

I also think it’s strange that a reasonable person can be offended by this, knowing the context of the times — not to mention what Armstrong has done with his fame and influence. I think the term “witch hunt” is being wildly misused, because as I think I heard Soren Petro put it, there really are witches here. And I think USADA is operating inappropriately and irresponsibly, wasting time and money chasing something that happened 10 years ago.

In other words: I assume Armstrong used the best doping procedures and PEDs his wealth could buy, and I also don’t care. Let’s all move on. Armstrong helping cancer patients, USADA helping curb drug use today and tomorrow instead of yesterday.

@ClintT13 Looking ahead and assuming a lot, SEC/MLS title games are both Dec 1. How mad are JoCo fans if you’re in Atlanta covering Mizzou?

I gotta tell you…I’d be disappointed not to be there if Sporting KC is playing for the MLS championship, but also without time for anyone who would think I should be there instead of Mizzou playing in the SEC football championship.

@Fawkesquez How much trouble is Weis in if #KUfball loses to SDSU Saturday? Gill never really recovered from NDSU loss. #TT

OK, well, this is a pretty good indication of how awful Turner Gill was and where KU football is at the moment. A Big 12 team should not worry about South Dakota State.

Like, ever.

Charlie Weis has a brilliant football mind, but it’s also true that his returns as a college coach have been underwhelming. I don’t know what to think of him, actually. I like the hire more now than when it happened, which isn’t saying much, but I still have reservations about how invested he is in making this work.

I do think a lot of people are missing an obvious fact, though. Charlie is taking over KU at a perfect time. It would be nearly impossible for him not to improve the place. Gill’s enormous failures probably added some money to Weis’ contract and put a friendly frame around how people will look at his effectiveness.

@bret_eubank Donald Stephenson over Russel Wilson, kinda like getting wings from Pizza Hut instead of The Peanut? Name 7 wins for the Chiefs.

At the moment, I’ve got them at 9-7.

vs Falcons: loss.

at Bills: win.

at Saints: loss.

vs Chargers: win.

vs Ravens: loss.

at Bucs: win.

vs Raiders: win.

at Chargers: loss.

at Steelers: loss.

vs Bengals: win.

vs Broncos: win.

vs Panthers: win.

at Browns: win.

at Raiders: loss.

vs Colts: win.

at Broncos: loss.

@rsmartt what are the odds that the Chiefs make the playoffs this season?

30 percent.

@theGeneric1 #TT Which is more likely for the chiefs, 10-6 or 6-10? #TemperedExpectations

Well, let’s be honest. There often isn’t much difference between 10-6 and 6-10. If everything — I mean EVERYthing, so Cassel is great, Flowers is healthy, Poe comes along, the whole thing — goes right for the Chiefs, I could see them at 12-4.

If everything — so, basically, just the opposite of all that other stuff — I could see them at 5-11.

To answer your question, I’d take 10-6. And keep in mind, the rest of the division is mostly the same way. The Raiders have a chance to be bad, but the Chargers and Broncos each have a wide range of possibilities this year. The Chargers’ best chances are behind them, and nobody can be sure how Peyton Manning will hold up — if he gets hurt, that thing goes down in a hurry.

@craigabrenner What is the best way to deal with in-laws who plan all events on Sunday afternoons during the #NFL season? Aside from divorce #TT

You gotta play offense here, not defense. Invite them over to your place, and you control the scene. Your TV will be on, football in (their) background, and you can earn points as the welcoming host.

@KyleR who is your favorite athlete to follow on twitter?

Danny Duffy is OK, but I gotta say, for the most part, athletes are pretty terrible on Twitter. Tends to be a bunch of “how abt a RT for my birthdy!!!!” and vague inspirational quotes and talk about how there’s too many haters out there.

@patronaut0709 #TwitterTuesday Why is everyone so down on #KState? Finished 10-3 last year, are returning 17 starters, but picked 6th in #Big12

So here’s my preseason rankings:

1. Oklahoma

2. Texas

3. West Virginia

4. K-State

5. Oklahoma State

6. TCU

7. Baylor

8. Iowa State

9. Texas Tech

10. Kansas

I might have K-State third, but I lean West Virginia because those teams play in Morgantown. That said, I get it. Oklahoma State has loads of talent, even without Weeden and Blackmon, and TCU has a really good program and gets K-State in Fort Worth. I guess the point is there are a lot of good teams in the conference, and probably not a whole lot of difference between No. 3 and 6.

I’m a little surprised that Bill Snyder doesn’t get the benefit of the doubt in there, but it’s an easy explanation that they won SO many close games — this team got outgained over the course of the season, for crying out loud — and it’s reasonable to expect a few of those to go against the Wildcats.

Me, I don’t bet against Snyder.

@PhilGarver Lydia Ko won an LPGA event at 15 years old. At 15, what was your greatest accomplishment?

I know this is where I’m supposed to talk about beating Zelda or scoring 20 in some silly sophomore B-game or something, but I was just thinking about this, and both these things happened when I was 15: I got my first job at a newspaper, and first kissed the girl who is now my wife.

@bclarksp17 Who plays for the BCS “National Championship” this year, and who is most upset about not going?

LSU plays Oregon, and Alabama’s most upset about it because someone outside the SEC gets a chance.

And for the record, USC would be the pick, but they’re coached by a doofus.

@devil_fingers Could the 2012 Hosmer/Francoeur “Who Sucks More” contest eventually equal or surpass the legendary Jacobs/Guillen battle of 2009?

Wait. Is this really a thing? Francoeur dominates Hosmer in the sucking contest. This one’s a blowout. Francoeur has been the worst everyday player in baseball this year, and Hosmer is actually coming on a bit.

He’s hitting .295/.356/.436 in August, for instance. They’re both having bad years, but the advanced metrics case for Francoeur as the worst player in baseball is hard to ignore.

@mrchipdouglas in your #fhah opinion, who is the one untouchable Royal as far as offseason moves to get a true starting pitcher?

Like I say in the column, nobody’s untouchable. The Royals just aren’t good enough for that.

But it’s hard to imagine someone offering enough that it makes sense to trade away Sal Perez and, to a slightly lesser extent, Alcides Escobar. But if the right deal comes along, the Royals should pull the trigger.

I got into this in the column, but the Royals swing a much bigger stick in the trade market than free agent market. The good news is there are probably better pitchers to be had through trades. The bad news is it means giving up something good — Wil Myers, Eric Hosmer, Mike Moustakas — to get something good.

Just fair warning.

@dumbassrambling Just got back from Minnesota and my only goal was to catch a bigger walleye than yours .. I struck out .. not a single one! #TT

If you come at the king, you best not miss.

Comments

1. 

   Amanda Mellinger Glasgow

   9 months, 3 weeks ago

   Sushi isn’t vegetarian.

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