Twitter Tuesday: Chiefs, Royals, the Emil-and-Beyonce story, and fat jokes
The Kansas City Star
You might’ve already thought of this, but just stay with me a minute. I met some friends out to watch the “game” last night, and midway through the second quarter — I wasn’t taking notes, but I think Notre Dame had 3 yards of offense and ABC had 73 shots of A.J. McCarron’s girlfriend — and a friend said something that stuck.
If K-State beat Baylor, they’d be playing Notre Dame and probably beating them.
Which made me realize that all these people would be talking about how the SEC is just a shade less than the NFL, and I’d be telling them to shut up and, well, we’d both be right.
This week’s food recommendation is the Cello-esque BLT at Happy Gillis, and the reading recommendation is the wonderful What Do You Think Of Ted Williams Now? by the great Richard Ben Cramer, who passed away last night.
As always, thanks for your help. Let’s get to it.
@Speck60 I’m tired of just doing #TwitterTuesday when it’s convenient for you! This relationship isn’t working. I have needs too.
@gavinesq #TT question: Tell us, RIGHT NOW, what will the #Chiefs record be next season? When will Reid have then in the playoffs?
Well, the time that it’s taken to type this sentence is, literally, the entire span of me thinking about your first question. So with that disclaimer out there, well, heck, I don’t know, 7-9? And a big part of that is that the division’s bad, they play Jacksonville, and I do think there are good players on this team.
That may be a bit aggressive, though, because there sure doesn’t seem to be a great quarterback available and with Dwayne Bowe up for either a long-term contract or a more expensive franchise tag a sorry group of receivers is just as likely to get worse as better.
And I’ll say year three is the playoffs.
@jdplantinga Bowe seems like a perfect WR for Reid offense. When can we start talking to him about a new deal? #TwitterTuesday
See, I disagree with you. Reid’s receivers — look at Jeremy Maclin and Desean Jackson — tend to be more on the quick side than big. Terrell Owens is the exception here, not the rule.
But I also think that Reid is a smart enough guy that he can make it work with Bowe, and looking at how terrible the Chiefs’ other receivers are and that the team has the cap room, it just makes a lot of sense to keep him around. Whether that’s a four-year deal or just another franchise tag, I’m not sure — though if it’s a franchise tag they better have Branden Albert signed to a deal.
@joelmmathis As a former Chiefs fan living in Philly, wondering: What percentage of media at yesterday’s presser was from Philly?
Not to go all Clinton on you, but it depends on your definition of “media.” For our purposes, I’ll define it as sports media or at least media who often do sports.
And, wild guess here, I’d say 60 percent.
The Chiefs are the biggest thing here, and it’s really not close.^
^ I misread this question. My bad. It was pointed out to me on Twitter. I read it as what percentage of KC sports media was at the press conference, but that is very clearly not the question. There were a small handful of Philly reporters there. Maybe like three. So one or two percent. Sorry for the confusion.
@TheJeffReport will the Chiefs Zero Dark Thirty-like manhunt for a QB culminate with a draft pick, a FA signing, or both? #TT
My guess is they draft, though not necessarily with that first pick. The Michael Vick factor is also interesting, but I get the impression that Reid would like to create something new in Kansas City rather than just transfer what he had in Philly.
What I think is pretty simple: it doesn’t matter to me how the Chiefs acquire their new starting quarterback. I don’t care if it’s the first pick, the fourth round, a free agent, trade, or some sort of experiment that isn’t yet FDA approved.
But they gotta get that new starting quarterback.
@jschlitt If you’re the Chiefs and you can reverse one decision by Pioli? Which one do you reverse and why. #twittertuesday
Well, you know, we only talk about the GMs who are here…
OK, easy joke out of the way, and as long as we all understand it’s unfair and ultimately fruitless to do this I’d reverse the Donald-Stephenson-over-Russell-Wilson-in-last-year’s-draft decision.
Actually, do that, and Pioli might still be around. Hard to imagine this team going 2-14 with a competent quarterback. Maybe they don’t go 10-6 like the Seahawks with Wilson, but even if it’s 6-10 or something, with a promising rookie quarterback it changes the complexion of everything going on with this franchise.
Those banners flying above the stadium would’ve read differently, if nothing else.
@ColeYoung Which happens first… another 1 point safety, a Royals playoff win or a Chiefs playoff win?
Well, before we get to this, can we all watch Jadeveon Clowney erase that little Michigan running back again?
Again: holy crap.
You change the game here a bit saying “playoff win” for the Royals and Chiefs. And for our purposes here, I’m going to count a one-game playoff for the Royals.
And my order: Royals playoff win, then Chiefs, then Clark Hunt releases a rap video under the stage name “Yung Cleezy,” then another one-point safety.
Because, seriously. A one-point safety?
@jgolden72 Hey Sam….don’t forget to tell the Beyonce story on the blog
Right. Thanks for the reminder. For those who don’t recall, this came up after Emil’s 37th birthday last month. Someone mentioned it on Twitter, which made me think of this story…
So it’s spring training one year, and Emil’s playing for the A’s. I go into the Oakland clubhouse to talk to someone else, but I see Emil, familiar face, and we start talking for a minute. Emil is a treat, if you don’t know.
He once “slow-cooked” a rant to Dutton highlighted by calling himself “a playmaker,” compared his defense to both Torii Hunter and Roberto Clemente (seriously), and claiming that he beat Carl Crawford in a footrace — twice.
Anyway, on this day we’re sitting at this table just talking, both of us waiting for something else, when he brings up the off-the-field life of a big leaguer. He’s going on about how it’s different for him now, that he has to watch people’s motives, you know, normal stuff.
I notice one of the magazines at our table has Beyonce on the cover, and I interrupt him with what I assume was a bad joke about how ballplayers are in the game for stars like that.
He doesn’t flinch.
I’d never want to date her, he says.
We’re just different people.
I mean, I know I’m a good-looking dude, I’m doing my thing, but I’m just not that into her.
For the record: I remain unconvinced.
@RoyalsFreeOut Hey, I don’t know if you heard this, but Andy Reid is overweight, and Scott Pioli used a candy wrapper to teach a lesson. #TT
Haha, yes. Here’s what I don’t understand about the Reid-is-fat jokes: first, he’s not Mark Mangino. And second, he’s not even as big as the guy he’s replacing.
Where were all these fat jokes when Romeo Crennel was in charge?
Let me be clear that I’m not into the fat jokes. They’re lazy, usually un-funny, and unnecessarily mean. But I respect others’ right to make jokes, so I’m not saying Reid’s waist size should be off limits … just … really, guys? Football coaches tend to be big, the guy he’s replacing was even bigger, and plus Reid really does look like a walrus, so why all the fat jokes?
@c_jackley bleu cheese or ranch?
Blue cheese. C’mon, guys. Let’s not ask obvious questions.
@kcjunk more excited for andy reid being our head coach or the black keys coming in april? #asshat
Black Keys and, again, c’mon guys. Let’s lay off the obvious questions.
@ClintT13 The devil offers me a deal: 5 KC sports championships in my lifetime, but The Peanut closes forever & no more Tank 7. Take it?
Well, I don’t know how old you are or what kind of lifestyle you lead so I’m not sure how long we’re talking about here. But either way, here’s the thing … the devil won’t play fair with this.
If you take the championships, he’s going to turn the Explorers into a dynasty, or start counting Shawnee Mission Northwest cross country.
Plus, the PEANUT??? AND Tank 7???
Maybe I’d consider it differently if he agreed to let Boulevard produce Saisson Brett or something, but still, this is too close to my heart (and, presumably, clotting arteries). Let’s make Dayton and Reid and everyone else earn it.
@kent_swanson I haven’t been this excited since the last time Clark Hunt got the best perceived hire! You see where I’m going with this?
Yes, I most certainly do. It’s an important point to keep in mind, and why I’ve tried to keep my thoughts and takeaways to how Clark Hunt went about this rather than making any grand declarations about a coming monsoon of Super Bowls.
I like the hire, because I think it’s a good fit in the most important ways — offense, quarterback, credibility — but we should all understand that doesn’t mean much. Nobody thought much of the Bill Snyder hire at the time, and most expected Quin Snyder to be terrific. You just never know.
@ChicagoKirk7 #twittertuesday after watching Seattle’s QB this weekend, can we put to bed the idea that there are no QBs in this draft?
Yes. Sign me up. There will be a very, very good quarterback to come out of this draft. The Chiefs’ job is to find him.
@BobbyCave Give me your take on the national media’s response to the hiring of HCAR - most seem to be on the side of “Kansas City? Where?”
Honestly, I have no idea and no care. The consensus I get from football people, though, is that he’s a really good fit here — so long as burnout isn’t an issue.
@Grant4MU so that $70M payroll to break even nonsense was just an attempt to lower the bar so we’ll be happy with an $80M payroll, right?
Look, there’s no way to prove what I’m about to say here and even if it’s the absolute truth the people who make decisions for the Royals would never admit it but I believe it at my core so here goes:
The Royals were serious about that $70 million payroll, and then heard the justified backlash — in our paper and other places — and rethought it.
The Royals have always tended to be a bit reactionary, both for better and worse, and this fits the pattern. And you know what? I applaud them for it. Good for them. They listened to fans, and now they have a team that should be expected to win around 83 or 84 games next year, and in their crappy division that just might be enough for the most exciting baseball summer in nearly a decade.
@mmMOUF am i crazy for thinking Jamari Traylor has a better chance at the NFL than NBA? He would be scary at TE
Generally speaking, I think we all tend to underestimate the difficulty of moving from one sport to another. Except with Lebron James. Because that guy, I’m convinced, could be a Pro Bowler at at least three positions (wide receiver, tight end, pass rushing defensive end).
And here is the part where you bring up Antonio Gates and Jimmy Graham, and I don’t have a great comeback.
@patronaut0709 #TwitterTuesday as you as annoyed at the Look at Me Dance Ray Lewis does before and after every game as I am?
In theory, I agree with you. The dance is incredibly egomaniacal. It is also planned, and I prefer my sports emotion spontaneous.
But, and I really don’t know why, I have an exception for Lewis’ dance. It makes me laugh. Maybe because it’s so blatantly over the top. I don’t know. But I dig it. I hope that whatever pregame show he’s on next year, they let him enter the studio through smoke, dancing in what I assume will be a ridiculous suit.
@T_Dwyer Who’s KU’s non-con MVP, Withey or McLemore? Good arguments for either. #kubball
You’re right. Good arguments for either. But I’d side with Withey, just because he’s so unique. What he does doesn’t run into a cold night. It’s there, every game, impacting everything the other team does offensively. He’s also — seems to me, anyway — incredibly good at keeping his blocks in play, so a disproportionate number of them are turnovers.
McLemore is a star, obviously, and the team’s best scorer. I couldn’t argue passionately against him, I just think what Withey does is impossible to replace.
@markmksu Finally had a Z-Man (I live outta town). Was skeptical abt cheese & bbq. Kinda blew my mind. Thanks for the recommendation.#TT
This is what I do, you guys.